Friday, March 5, 2010

Friday Night At The Maul

I just spent a Friday night training at our maul mall store. What a night!

I need to address a few issues:

Is this a food court or a high school cafeteria? Holy Chick-fil-A! Teenagers in groups of 15 and 20. Really loud teenagers.

Speaking of Chick-fil-A, I'm going to say something that may get my ass kicked back to Massachusetts. In attempting to eat something healthy from the foodcourt, I've been avoiding the 3 Asian places, Mickey D's, Auntie's Ginormous Pretzel Store and Big Gigantic Cinnamon Bun Store. I have tried to eat the Grilled Chicken Sandwich at Chick-fil-A. I have even tried to LIKE the Grilled Chicken Sandwich at Chick-fil-A.

I REALLY don't like the Grilled Chicken Sandwich at Chick-fil-A. They are one of the most boring things on the planet. I think not liking Chick-fil-A is the sort of thing that's frowned upon in the South. They really love their Chick-fil-A. That's because they're eating the Chick-fil-A Chicken Sandwich that has 17!!!!!!!!! grams of fat.

I'll stop saying Chick-fil-A now.

Speaking of teenagers, now I'm going to say something that may make mothers of little white tweenagers really mad.

WTF????? Do you ALL drop your little girls off at the mall on Friday nights, dressed like little prostitutes? Do you know they come into our store and TRASH the place? 90% of these bands of roaming Britney Spears Wannbees spent the evening taking things off the display tables and dropping them on the floor. When we asked them to pick up the items, they rolled their eyes and giggled. We strongly suspect a few of them did a little shoplifting.

Can I give a SHOUT OUT to ALL the little African-American and Caribbean tweenage girls who came into our store tonight? You behaved yourselves like young ladies. You were respectful toward us and our store. Your Mamas must be really proud of you. I did realize that many of you were WITH your Mamas, but I bet you behave the same way when they're not around.

I LOVED the Asian woman who came into the store and kept showing me products and asking me "What is this?". After I told her a few of the names, she said "I'm learning my English!"

Why haven't I bought stock in Build-A-Bear? I saw at least 25 boxes from their store tonight.

It's midnight and I have to be back at the maul mall at 9 am. It will be my last training session, then I'm back to my own store. I won't miss the Friday nights at all.


bunny said...

Thanks for the laugh about the tweens and Chik-fil-A...I will admit I do NOT like the CFA grilled sandwich and I am 110% Southern. It tastes like rubber. Mickey D's is better.

Make sure your manager supports you, then take those little girls and say "I am NOT your mother and you WILL pick that up--NOW!" Then, if they don't, keep a camera behind the counter and take photos of them. When they ask why, say "to give the mall security." Maybe that will scare the little whore bitches. Worse case, they will probably be pregnant in a few years and at home with their babies on Friday nights.

And I cannot believe BAB is still so popular!

Jen on the Edge said...

I don't go to our mall or any mall because they're so repulsive.

I'm not a Chil-Fil-A fan either and think I've pretty much gotten my girls to agree with me.

And I hope to hell that neither of my girls ever dresses like a wee ho or behaves like trash.

Loretta a/k/a Mrs. Pom said...

My family LOVED Chick Fil A when we lived in the south. Me, hated it! I feel exhausted just reading about Friday night at the Mall. Hope you never have to go back!

Heather T said...

I am laughing, laughing, laughing...



The last time I was at a mall, my daughter was trying on clothes that could have made her look like a prostitute, but I and a good friend said 'no.' Whew.

I hope you survive the mall a few days longer!

Bee said...

As the mother of a teenage son - I see many of the girls his age looking like hoe's - the mall seems to be the place to be "seen" - fortunately my son has a nice girlfriend who doesn't dress like a hoe! Where are their mothers?

Congrats on graduating from the Maul!

Cat said...

Bee - there mothers are on dates with their latest boyfriends.

We don't have a mall here, so I never even had to deal with that whole scene with either kid thank goodness.

Hope you get to the home store soon.

Meg at the Members Lounge said...

Congratulations on finishing your training, and more importantly, your penance at the "maul"! You would not believe how carefully I craft my trips there to avoid the least amount of people I can.

I do have to say my mall had a Legal Seafoods which has a kick ass tuna burger. That other stuff - ICK!

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I just despise malls and teenagers together...
We don't have chick-fila here so I confess I've never had one ever.

Lisa said...

That is so funny!

catsteevens said...

When I see those Britney Spears Wannbees it makes me glad I have boys :)

catsteevens said...

....meaning I am glad I am raising boys and not girls.

Did not intend to mean that I'm glad the Britney Spears Wannbees are out there for my boys to go out with or anything.

I'll shut up now, it's late and I'm not making much sense :P

Dean Grey said...

Ouch sounds like a rough day!

I wonder if it were all boys instead of girls would things be better or worse?


Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

If I had to spend that much time in a mall I would probably be crying.

Yes, stuck-up suburban tweens do suck.