Sunday, July 20, 2008

Dear Customer: You Made Me Cranky

Dear Customer: You, sitting on the sofa, talking on the phone, drinking a coffee.
This is a STORE. Not your LIVING ROOM. You can go home now. Thank You.

Dear Customer: You, with the screaming toddler. Talking to the other woman with a screaming toddler. It is 12:30PM. Your toddler is HUNGRY. Your toddler needs a NAP. You can go home now. Thank You.

Dear Customer: You, who wants to go out of our stockroom door to the parking lot. NO, YOU CAN'T. I'm not even allowed to go out the stockroom door to get to the parking lot and I WORK HERE! You can go home now. Thank You.

Dear Customer: You, the one shopping for a rug with a 3 yr old and a 1 yr old.
WHY are you asking the 3 yr old which one would look best under your kitchen table? Is she PAYING FOR IT? Is she an INTERIOR DESIGNER? And if you let her pick up the BIG HOURGLASS that is made of GLASS one more time, I will scream at her. You can go home now. Thank You.

Dear Customer: You, with the double jogging stroller. You are absolutely right. It WON'T fit around the furniture. You wanna know WHY? It's the size of a FREAKING VOLKSWAGEN, THAT'S WHY!! You can go home now. Thank You.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Um, bad day at the office?

Badger said...

This is why I could never work with the public.

Anonymous said...

Which is why I NEVER shop with my kids and why I'm always super friendly to retail clerks because I cannot imagine the hell they go through with people every day.

Mrs. G. said...

I could never own a business...because of the customers. Yikes!

josetteplank.com said...

Ah, flipping AMEN!

There should be a Shopping Etiquette or Know-How class taught somewhere in middle school.

One of my faves is once a month when someone comes into the bookstore and insists that we are actually a library and where can they get a card.

abb said...

Well, at least you have a sense of humor - and kindly share it with all of us!

Amy A. said...

Unfortunately, without all those people, we would be out of jobs!

People can be the most annoying people.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Don't you wish you could say it out loud just once?!

Kerry said...

This made me laugh out loud! I know exactly how you feel. I worked as a manager at Wendy's for a looong time (don't ask) and although I could fake nice with the best of 'em, you pinpointed what I really thought!

Rima said...

Oh, man - I HATE it when people ask their toddlers for decorating advice. And then people wonder why kids are spoiled? Bah.

Anonymous said...

Ah, retail!

Thanks for the reminder so when I start going to to Mr. Pom that I'm moving to the Cape and opening a [__________] insert: yarn store/bookstore/antique store/wine store, he has even more reason to slap me upside the head.