Actually, it's Interview BY Cat.
January 22 is National Answer Your Cat's Questions Day.
Honest to Friskies. I Googled it. In honor of our cats and how they stare at us with a tilt of the head, I allowed Tigger to interview me.
Q: Is it true that I'm adopted?
A: Yes, it's true. Chip the Bunny had passed away and I made the mistake of taking the kids to see a litter of kittens. You were a tiny little ball of grey and white fluff with big blue eyes. Your Mom was a Single Calico. She had a one night stand with some unknown Stud Cat, who turned out to be a HUGE Maine Coon Cat.
Q: Why don't I have a dignified name like T.S. Eliot or Carl Sandberg?
A: Sorority Girl was in a dance production of Winnie The Pooh when we got you.
Q: Remember that summer when you had me shaved?
A: Yes. It was very hot and we didn't have air conditioning. You were living on the dining room table, under the ceiling fan and panting like a dog.
Q: Why do you wiggle your feet when you read?
A: I'm hyperactive. Stop biting my toes.
Q: Are we having tuna for lunch?
A: I haven't decided.
Q: What do you think when you're reading and I stand on your chest, in between the book and your eyes?
A: Can't think. Can't breathe. Get your butt. Outta my face.
Q: Can I have a baby brother?
A: No. I'm too old. Go take another nap.